I am a film geek, and like all geeks, I’m no less than slightly bit of a snob. I find it straightforward to pooh-pooh Hollywood’s reliance on sequels, remakes, reboots and Tv adaptations as proof of the dearth of good, original concepts.
Nevertheless, us pooh-poohers are hypocrites in a way, because we all have no less than one decidedly un-original challenge we would wish to see on a really big display.
For me, it’s an adaptation of my favourite childhood Television present, which lived on for years in reruns and Television reunion movies. It’s a project with great attraction to my now middle-aged generation and I believe that the action and sci-fi-loving youth of in the present day may also take pleasure in it. As a matter of truth, there have been numerous efforts through the years to mount a film adaptation of the collection, albeit with a (vital) title change. It hasn’t happened but, despite the whining of fans equivalent to I.
No film will ever match the one working in my head, after all, however seeing some bionic motion onscreen and hearing that theme music would actually do the eight-yr-outdated inside some good.
I’d share my imaginative and prescient of the entire movie with you, but I know the way attention spans are these – hey, let’s go ride our bikes! So you may simply need to learn and imagine.
For the uninitiated, this is written in a reasonably old-fashioned screenplay format. O.S. means “Offscreen.”
This is the script for my fantasy film trailer.
The edge of Earth’s ambiance, trying down at the planet. The words “Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall…” appear onscreen because the roar of rocket engines are heard approaching. A very quick aircraft is then seen streaking through the air.
INT. AIRCRAFT COCKPIT, DAY:
STEVE AUSTIN, a U.S. Air Drive pilot (Ryan Reynolds), adjusts the controls of the aircraft as he speaks with ground control.
All methods regular, floor control.
Inside, Ground Control HEADQUARTERS
Many people are sitting and standing around pc and video displays, monitoring AUSTIN’s flight. The ground Management OFFICIAL, a middle-aged balding man in a brief-sleeved shirt and tie talks to AUSTIN.
Floor Control OFFICIAL
We learn you, Colonel Austin. Good work.
Hey, when we take this factor to Mars, can you be sure that I am on board?
Floor Management OFFICIAL (Grins)
We’ll see about it. For now, just get residence in one piece.
That is the plan.
The craft begins to shake and considered one of its engines seems to be misfiring.
Starboard engine appearing unusual.
Ground Control OFFICIAL
We’re watching it. Cling on.
A technician in Floor Control will get the official’s attention and points to his pc screen.
We’ve lost the starboard engine, Now the port side is failing!
Floor Management OFFICIAL
Steve! Are you there?
Inside the cockpit, AUSTIN pushes numerous buttons but appears calm.
I’ve lost throttle…
A technician stands up and points to a large monitor, displaying the craft tumbling towards earth, apparently catching on fire. Everyone within the room stands up to look at.
Floor Control OFFICIAL
Steve, eject now!
She’s breaking up! She’s breaking…
Everybody watches in horror as the craft explodes far above Earth’s floor.
DESERT, EXTERIOR, DAY
A parachute with a limp, broken human figure connected is seen descending to earth. The phrases, “Humpty Dumpty had an excellent fall” seem onscreen.
INT. Army HOSPITAL, Surgical procedure WING, DAY
A gaggle of docs work frantically on AUSTIN. Behind a glass partition, OSCAR (Morgan Freeman) watches the surgery. Subsequent to him stands a physician.
Two concussions. One arm and most of his rib cage crushed. His left eye and each legs are gone. He is fortunate to be respiratory.
INT. HOSPITAL ROOM, DAY
AUSTIN lies in a hospital bed, closely bandaged, with monitoring machines beeping. The words, “All of the king’s horses, and all of the king’s men…” appear.
OSCAR stands earlier than a gaggle of government officials in a conference room.
Gentlemen, we are able to rebuild him.
Shots of AUSTIN in surgical procedure having various mechanical gadgets hooked up to him as the opening theme music, a pumped-up model of the one used within the collection, begins.
We have the technology.
INT. TESTING FACILITY, DAY
AUSTIN, a number of minor cuts, bandages and stitches nonetheless on his face, sits on a desk in a hospital gown. He holds up his right arm, which is now an uncovered bionic limb, and moves his mechanical fingers. He’s astonished and fascinated.
Now we have the capability to construct the world’s first bionic man.
AUSTIN kicks a thick brick wall, clearly put there for the check, breaking an enormous gap in it as OSCAR, DR WELLS (Dan Aykroyd) and some others look on.
Steve Austin will likely be that man.
Testing his bionic arm, AUSTIN accidentally breaks a heavy table in half, causing a computer and other expensive electronic gear to fall to the ground and crash. Austin appears to be like at DR RUDY WELLS, slightly embarrassed.
You understand, Colonel, every single day you discover a new way to make this project more expensive.
The dollar signal, “$,” flashes onscreen.
MONTAGE: totally different shots of AUSTIN in motion conditions, using his bionic eye, arm and legs to leap from transferring vehicles and thwart gunmen making an attempt to kill him. Between shots a price is shown onscreen which grows each time, beginning with “$6,” then “$60,” then “$600,” and many others.
Better than he was earlier than.
MONTAGE continues, exhibiting AUSTIN in increasingly more harmful situations, together with fighting one other man wearing hello-tech battle armor, combating off a bunch of sword-wielding assassins, and so on., as the worth continues to rise between the shots, to $6000,” $60,000,” “$600,000,” etc.
Better, stronger, sooner.
As OSCAR says the ultimate three words, the montage quickens and exhibits AUSTIN in his most dangerous conditions, ending with a leap off of a constructing toward an escaping helicopter as the ultimate worth fills the screen – $6,000,000,000. Block letters come down from the highest of the display screen and up from the bottom to form the title, ‘THE SIX BILLION Dollar MAN,” because the theme tune concludes. The title is then changed with the phrases ” THIS Summer.